TOOBIN' (NES, 1989)
I've always considered the NES version of Toobin' to be a much more accessible game than its arcade counterpart. They ditched the pesky paddle controls and remolded it into a unique shooter wherein two radical dudes, Bif and Jet, scroll vertically downward and throw soda cans (they must be full?) at various nuisances and debris in the river and on its shores.
Let's be honest, the guys are meant to be slamming beers while floating down the river, right? That's what people do. I've never heard of anyone chugging Coca-Cola while doing this type of thing. I assume someone somewhere along the release of this project pulled the same kind of Nintendo of America power move which saw Vodka Drunkinski repackaged as Soda Popinski.
The featured rivers range from fact to fiction with matching musical themes-- some of the best on the system with 8 bit renditions of classical scores, backwood banjo beats, surf rock, and so much more.
The boys float down familiar rivers like Colorado and Rio Grande before hitting whirlpool warp zones to fantastical waterways like Styx and the Canals of Mars, each chock full of nettlesome denizens from dinosaurs to devils. And without any frustrating paddle controls to worry about, we can thoroughly enjoy one of the more rollicking experiences on the NES.
WALKTHROUGH
Movement is momentum based, so you need to hold a direction to accelerate and stop.
Focus on the trajectories of various enemies and their projectiles and avoid them or stop them with a well timed can toss.
Grab the six pack for unlimited cans for the duration of the level.
Get the beach ball to throw cans faster and longer for the current level.
Get patches for extra lives.
Everything else is just points. I'm still waiting on a Retro Achievements leaderboard to see how my best scores will stack up.
If you collect all the letters in T-O-O-B-I-N-', you can trade them all for a million points, but it's a risky move considering you can also trade three letters at a time for three more lives (patches). So unless you're an expert yet (and even if you are) you will need them because this game has some very difficult levels toward the end.
Keeping the letters through the ends of each class also awards bonus points totaling 280,000.
CLASS 1
-------
COLORADO
>WARP ZONE I
-RIGHT SIDE TO BRONTOSAURI CLASS 3 & 3 PATCHES
-LEFT SIDE TO NEVADA CLASS 4 & 3 PATCHES
-BOTTOM TO FINISH CLASS 1 TO YUKON CLASS 2
OKEFENOKEE
-RED "O" IN BUSH NEAR BEGINNING
RIO GRANDE
-GREEN "O" IN MIDDLE CACTUS IN SECOND BUNCH NEAR END
JURASSIC
-"T" IN BUSH NEAR BEGINNING AFTER SECOND DINOSAUR
CLASS 2
-------
YUKON
-"B" INSIDE ICEBERG ON LAND, RIGHT SIDE, AFTER 2000 MARKER WHERE MUSIC CHANGES
NILE
-"I" IN BUSH BEFORE WATERFALLS
-2 PATCHES IN WATERFALLS NEAR TORNADO
CUPRUM
-"N" IN OIL CAN IN MIDDLE OF RIVER, LEFT SIDE
MISSISSIPPI
-"'" IN STICK ON LEFT SIDE NEAR END OF RIVER (YY'Y)
-3 PATCHES AT END
NIGHTMARE
-"T" IN BUSH IN MIDDLE WHERE WATERFALL STARTS, BUT YOU CAN GET IT FROM LEFT ON OUTSIDE OF WALLS
CLASS 3
-------
BRONTOSAURI
-"T" IN BUSH NEAR BEGINNING NEXT TO BEACH BALL
RIO DEL ORO
-RED "O" IN CACTUS ABOVE SIX PACK ON LEFT SIDE NEAR BEGINNING
BLACK FOREST
-GREEN "O" IN STICK IN MIDDLE RIGHT AFTER FLYING TREE, BEFORE 2000 MARKER
CANALS OF MARS
-"T" IN BARREL NEAR END, IN THE MIDDLE OF A BEACH BALL AND AN ALIEN
STYX
-RED "O" IN BUSH ON LEFT SIDE ABOVE A PITCHFORK DEVIL
CLASS 4
-------
NEVADA
-"B" AT VERY BEGINNING, UNDER 25,000 MARKER NEAR TORNADO
>WARP ZONE II
-RIGHT SIDE TO BRONTOSAURI CLASS 6 & 3 PATCHES
-LEFT SIDE TO SNAKE CLASS 7 & 3 PATCHES
-BOTTOM TO FINISH CLASS 4 TO YUKON CLASS 5
AMAZON
-"I" IN FIRST STICK ON THE LEFT
ARGENTUM
-"N" IN BARREL NEAR BEGINNING AFTER 2ND TOXIC SLUDGE DUMP
AMERICAN
-"'" IN SECOND GROUP OF 3 STICKS (Y'Y)
BEACH PARTY
-RAM YOUR TUBE INTO THE BOOMBOX TO START MUSIC
CLASS 5
-------
YUKON
-"T" INSIDE ICEBERG ON LAND, RIGHT SIDE, AFTER 2000 MARKER WHERE MUSIC CHANGES
CUPRUM
-RED "O" IN OIL CAN IN MIDDLE OF RIVER, LEFT SIDE
OKEFENOKEE
-GREEN "O" IN BUSH NEAR BEGINNING
STYX
-"T" IN BUSH ON LEFT SIDE NEAR END ABOVE PITCHFORK DEVIL
NILE
-RED "O" IN BUSH IN MIDDLE OF RIVER
-2 PATCHES IN WATERFALLS NEAR TORNADO
CLASS 6
-------
BRONTOSAURI
-"B" IN BUSH NEXT TO BEACH BALL
RIO GRANDE
-"I" IN MIDDLE OF 2ND BUNCH OF CACTUS' AT END
BLACK FOREST
-"N" IN STICK IN MIDDLE RIGHT AFTER FLYING TREE, BEFORE 2000 MARKER
CANALS OF MARS
-"'" IN BARREL NEAR END, IN THE MIDDLE OF A BEACH BALL AND AN ALIEN
NIGHTMARE
-"T" IN BUSH IN MIDDLE WHERE WATERFALL STARTS, BUT YOU CAN GET IT FROM LEFT ON OUTSIDE OF WALLS
CLASS 7
-------
SNAKE
-"T" IN FIRST STICK ON RIGHT AT VERY BEGINNING
>WARP ZONE III
-TO YUKON CLASS 8 & 1 PATCH
AMAZON
-RED "O" IN FIRST STICK ON LEFT
ARGENTUM
-GREEN "O" IN FIRST BARREL
OKEFENOKEE
-"T" IN BUSH NEAR BEGINNING
RIO GRANDE
-RED "O" IN MIDDLE CACTUS IN 2ND BUNCH NEAR END
CANALS OF MARS
-RED (GRAY?) "O" IN BARREL AT END
NIGHTMARE
-"T" IN BUSH IN MIDDLE WHERE WATERFALL STARTS, BUT YOU CAN GET IT FROM LEFT ON OUTSIDE OF WALLS
CLASS 8
-------
YUKON
-"B" INSIDE ICEBERG ON LAND, RIGHT SIDE, AFTER 2000 MARKER WHERE MUSIC CHANGES
ARGENTUM
-"I" IN A BARREL IN MIDDLE, HARD TO MISS
MISSISSIPPI
-"N" IN STICK ON LEFT SIDE NEAR END OF RIVER (YYNY)
-3 PATCHES AT END
STYX
-"'" IN BUSH ON LEFT SIDE NEAR END ABOVE PITCHFORK DEVIL
NILE
-"T" IN BUSH IN MIDDLE OF RIVER
-2 PATCHES IN WATERFALLS NEAR TORNADO AT THE END
CLASS 9
-LETTERS MOVE SLOWLY AGAIN
-------
RIO GRANDE
-"T" IN MIDDLE CACTUS IN 2ND BUNCH NEAR END
YUKON
-RED "O" IN ICEBERG ON LAND, RIGHT SIDE, AFTER 2000 MARKER WHERE MUSIC CHANGES
BRONTOSAURI
-GREEN "O" IN BUSH NEXT TO BEACH BALL
BLACK FOREST
-"T" IN STICK IN MIDDLE RIGHT AFTER FLYING TREE
CANAL OF MARS
-RED "O" IN BARREL AT END
AMERICAN
-GREEN "O" IN SET OF 3 STICKS
BEACH PARTY
-HIT THE BOOMBOX FOR MUSIC
-SHOOT THE COOLER FOR POINTS
TOTALLY AWESOME! YOU WON THE GAME, DUDE!!
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